“Dear 2010 Herzl Staff”
June 17, 2010 by Herzl Camp Admin, under Summer Updates.
A parody letter By Anna Simon
Dear 2010 Herzl Staff,
Is there something wrong with your phones? Did you, perhaps, change your number? I have left several messages with Drea Lear over the past few weeks to see if I could find out the name of Z’s Taste counselor and have not heard a thing. You know, I was a Taste counselor once and I think that earns me the right to know who will be taking care of my son this week. I’m sure it’s not a big deal for you guys to tell me. I promise I won’t tell anyone else. I tried to ask Sarah Gruesner and Steven Kane at the buses but they would not spill the beans….Don’t they know who I am?
I didn’t really read through the Camper Information Packet, so I hope it’s ok that I packed a few extra things in Z’s metal trunk. I threw in a large portable boom box, a few water balloons, candles and matches, a toaster, some silly string, fireworks, homemade cookies and laser pointers. I just think those items will really enhance camp for Z and his friends. I’m quite sure that the 2010 Ozrim had no problem carrying his trunk as they looked like a really strong and capable group. I just know that Z’s bunkmates are going to love having a toaster in their cabin so they can have a late night snack.
After the buses left on Monday, I raced home to check the web site and was disappointed that I didn’t see any pictures of the campers uploaded IMMEDIATELY. I check the web site every hour and think you need to take more pictures of Z in general. On that note, could you ask him to put on a different shirt and comb his hair when you take the next picture? He seems to always be wearing that same shirt and he’s not always looking directly at the camera. If you could just help him pose, that would be great. Speaking of the buses, what was up with the rain? Someone promised me that IT NEVER RAINS AT HERZL CAMP. I would expect that the director, Anne Hope, could do something about that. I plan on calling Lauren (Berman) Kaplan and Sue (Waldman) Roether next week to discuss the terrible weather.
I also left several messages for Dr. Hope Frisch in the Marp to find out if Z got any ticks or mosquito bites. Why hasn’t she returned my calls? I’m sure she has a moment to invite Z to the Marp and count his bug bites for me. I doubt she’s very busy this week.
I’d like to request that Z gets moved out of his cabin and into another one. I realize he only has a few days left but I think his experience will be better if gets to make some more new friends. Actually, maybe you could just have Z call me as I really miss hearing his voice. Plus, I’d like to let him know that I sent him a care package of his Uncle Jesse Simon’s Hot Cereal.
I’m going to stop by camp on Shabbat because Flip Frisch and I will be in the neighborhood. I hope that’s ok. I’m sure it won’t disrupt camp at all and it won’t make other campers miss their families. While we’re there, I’d like to make sure Z gets a Shmutz Buster t-shirt. I promised him he’d get a shirt if he picked up garbage in front of Zander Abrams and I don’t want him to be disappointed.
By the way, when we were at Family Camp last summer, Z lost a white sock. Could you please look for it? If you can’t find it, I’d like a credit to Z’s chanut account.
Shabbat Shalom Everyone! Oh, I forgot to mention that we didn’t pack anything white. He doesn’t really have to wear white, does he?
Anna
P.S. To anyone reading this who thinks I am serious…you must be a first-time Herzl parent! Your children are in excellent hands because the Herzl Camp staff members are incredibly capable, energetic, creative, hard working, caring and responsible. I am envious of any kid who gets to go to camp with these Herzl staff members. Herzl is the one place on earth where kids can be themselves, connect with others, try something new, step outside their comfort zone and celebrate every little thing they do. Yes, I cried when the buses pulled out of the parking lot (good thing it was heavy dewing so it wasn’t so obvious) but not because I was sad to see Z go. I cried because I was completely overcome with emotion just knowing what Z was about to experience. His life will be forever changed BECAUSE OF CAMP. Thank you, Anne Hope and the Herzl Staff, for taking care of my kid this week (yep, I’m crying again).